February is National Teen Dating Violence Prevention Month
During the month of February, if you have teenage children spend some time discussing dating violence and it’s effects. There are numerous resources available to both parents and teens. Inside this months newsletter Teen Dating Violence will be covered. But additional resources are always good.
A great resources is the National Domestic Violence Hotline via their website http://www.ndvh.org/. CBS News Anchor Katie Curic has hosted a story on Teen Dating Violence that is available via their website.
The statistics above highlight the likelihood you or someone you know has or will experience violence in a dating relationship. Dating violence can take many forms, including psychological and emotional abuse, physical abuse, and sexual abuse. It can occur in the context of casual dating or serious long-term relationships.
Psychological and Emotional Abuse
If a boyfriend or girlfriend humiliates, insults, or swears at you, you are experiencing psychological and emotional abuse. Other examples include: attempting to control a boyfriend or girlfriend’s activities, trying to destroy his or her self-confidence and self-esteem, and isolating the person from other friends and family. Threats of violence are also abusive and should always be taken seriously.
Physical Abuse
Physical abuse includes such things as: hitting, slapping, punching, shoving, kicking, biting, and hair-pulling. It also includes the use of a weapon, such as a club, knife, or gun against a boyfriend or girlfriend.
Bother teenage boys and teenage girls report being victims of physical violence in relationships. Typically, however, teenage boys and teenage girls use physical force for different reasons and with different results. While both tend to report acting violently because they were angry, teenage boys are much more likely to use force in order to control their girlfriends, while girls more often act violently in self-defense.
Teenage girls suffer more from relationship violence, emotionally and physically. They are much more likely than teenage boys to have serious injuries and to report being terrified. In contrast, male victims seldom seem to fear violence by their dates or girlfriends, often saying that the attacks did not hurt and that they found the violence amusing.
Sexual Abuse
The term, sexual abuse, refers to forced or unwanted sexual activity or rape. It is also considered sexual abuse to coerce or pressure someone to engage in sexual activity or try to engage in sexual activity with someone who is under the influence of drugs or alcohol.
Teenage girls in heterosexual relationships are much more likely than teenage boys to suffer from sexual abuse.
How to help a teen victim of dating violence
A great resources is the National Domestic Violence Hotline via their website http://www.ndvh.org/. CBS News Anchor Katie Curic has hosted a story on Teen Dating Violence that is available via their website.
Is it a big deal?
So just how prevalent is Teen Dating Violence in America? Well if you look at the statistics it is a growing issue.
- 1 in 10 teenagers reports being a victim of physical dating violence.
- 1 in 4 teenagers reports verbal, physical, emotional or sexual abuse each year.
- 72% of 8th and 9th graders report "dating."
The statistics above highlight the likelihood you or someone you know has or will experience violence in a dating relationship. Dating violence can take many forms, including psychological and emotional abuse, physical abuse, and sexual abuse. It can occur in the context of casual dating or serious long-term relationships.
Psychological and Emotional Abuse
If a boyfriend or girlfriend humiliates, insults, or swears at you, you are experiencing psychological and emotional abuse. Other examples include: attempting to control a boyfriend or girlfriend’s activities, trying to destroy his or her self-confidence and self-esteem, and isolating the person from other friends and family. Threats of violence are also abusive and should always be taken seriously.
Physical Abuse
Physical abuse includes such things as: hitting, slapping, punching, shoving, kicking, biting, and hair-pulling. It also includes the use of a weapon, such as a club, knife, or gun against a boyfriend or girlfriend.
Bother teenage boys and teenage girls report being victims of physical violence in relationships. Typically, however, teenage boys and teenage girls use physical force for different reasons and with different results. While both tend to report acting violently because they were angry, teenage boys are much more likely to use force in order to control their girlfriends, while girls more often act violently in self-defense.
Teenage girls suffer more from relationship violence, emotionally and physically. They are much more likely than teenage boys to have serious injuries and to report being terrified. In contrast, male victims seldom seem to fear violence by their dates or girlfriends, often saying that the attacks did not hurt and that they found the violence amusing.
Sexual Abuse
The term, sexual abuse, refers to forced or unwanted sexual activity or rape. It is also considered sexual abuse to coerce or pressure someone to engage in sexual activity or try to engage in sexual activity with someone who is under the influence of drugs or alcohol.
Teenage girls in heterosexual relationships are much more likely than teenage boys to suffer from sexual abuse.
How to help a teen victim of dating violence
- Listen and believe him/her. Don’t ask blaming questions. Remind them that the violence is not his/her fault.
- Talk openly and without judgment. Don’t ask, “Why don’t you just break up with this?”
- Support their efforts to control their own life. Don’t expect them to follow all of your advice.
- Read inside on what you can do to help
Comments
These programs, usually affiliated with the local high school, offer expert coaching to kids from around 7 years old until they enter high school. The programs have a goal of serving as feeders to the high school team, and work well in this capacity.
However, they are also a great way for kids, male and female, to build physical strength and endurance, gain self-confidence and discipline, and, for the girls, learn that they are on an equal footing, physically and intellectually, with the boys.
Most altercations end up on the ground, and in the case of dating assualts, it is reasonable to expect that they would begin there. Therefore, making your daughter a black belt in taekwondo or a golden gloves boxer will do her little to no good at all.
Wrestling, on the other hand, will allow your child to become confortable on the ground, and will theach them the moves that will allow them to turn the tide and make their escape.
Parents of the girls in our junior club have even combined Jiu-Jitsu and other grappling arts into their daughters training, which has resulted in the girls dominating the boys that they face in most matches.
Plus, girls are now welcome on high school and college teams, meaning that an early investment in your girls' safety and well-being can also lead to scholarship opportunities not open to girls who pursue more traditional sports.
All in all, starting your girls off in wrestling at an early age will definitely be one of the best things you can do for their overall well-being, both now and well into their adult years.
Talk to your local high school coach or search for youth wrestling clubs online to see what is available in your area. You won't regret it!